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Louise Kerr

The Double Standards of Sex


As a female in my early 20s, I have sadly come accustomed to the hypocrisy and embedded attitudes towards women, men and sex.


It is 2022 and the stigma surrounding this topic is still prominent. Stemming back to my first ever Sex Education lesson in primary school, the girls and boys were separated and received different academia. For the girls; periods, tampons and pads, for the boys; erections and arousal. Despite both topics being important in preparation of hormonal changes, we never gained an understanding of the other sex, resulting in teen boys (and some adult males) being disturbed, revolted and uncomfortable with this natural occurrence.


Misconceptions upon women

Despite some of these ideas being laughable and entertaining to research, it also made my blood boil at the lack of education/transparency surrounding females and their anatomy which has resulted in some of the population gaining inaccurate viewpoints and establishing poor opinions.


'Body hair is gross' - It has been suggested that Women began shaving in 3000BCE, making it an engrained expectation of today's society. The idea is for cosmetic purposes only, we share chemically identical hair growth to men, making us indifferent to our hairy male counterparts.


'Losing your virginity' - Virginity is a social construct. Derived by men, it established a women's value for marriage, however, nothing is 'taken' or 'lost'. Often women are judged or shamed for losing their virginity whereas men are congratulated.


'High body count makes her a sl*g' - similarly to virginity, a women's body count (amount of sexual partners) often places her in a 'ranking' system, despite having no correlation to her personality or character. Men are often applauded and respected for a high number in their body count.


'Women don't need sex like men' - Throughout history, women have been taught that sex is a 'taboo' subject, therefore, not discussing their desires. In addition, the idea of 'blue balls' is a term that has been derived to suggest that sexually frustrated men are in pain and need relieving. These myths need to be debunked as research suggests hormones affecting libido can vary in both males and females.


Conclusive thoughts

Unfortunately, my urgency to discuss this topic came from a recent experience involving my friend, disclosing to me that her boyfriend was unaware that women masturbated as his female friends said they didn't. Sadly, society has conditioned women to be embarrassed about self-pleasure, of which is normalised for men. He continued by telling her he was uncomfortable with her masturbating as he believes she is 'cheating', despite it being totally acceptable from himself. I was incredibly shocked by his mindset and complete hypocrisy, however, I realised that this attitude is probably common amongst our society.

It's vital that we discuss the double standards of sex more openly in society, being one of many areas of inequality in men and women, this should be a step forward for the current and future society.



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